Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Getting Nervous


Blue was a champ with the trigger shot!  My arm is still a little sore but otherwise today was a great day.  Today was the first day in 20 that I haven’t taken a single shot!  It is weird to feel like a normal person… Well not totally normal, I’m still taking the dexamethasone, an oral antibiotic and an antibiotic suppository.
Yesterday I made the mistake of reading a post on Dr. Sher's blog about the importance of the trigger shot.  Apparently he had a patient once who forgot to mix the liquid and powder together and just gave herself a shot of water instead of the trigger.  When he went in for retrieval he couldn’t get a single egg because none of them matured.
I’m nervous about tomorrow.  Egg retrieval is set for 10 am tomorrow.  What if I did something wrong?  I double checked the trigger shot 10 times so it probably wasn’t that, but maybe it was something else?  It’s exciting to have gotten to this stage but I don’t do well with situations I have no control over.  I wish I could plan it or organize it or do anything to have control over how it will go.
I guess I’m just going to have to appreciate the fact that I am paying a great doctor gobs of money to have all the control.  I’m paying him so I don’t have to worry… so why am I still worrying?

4 comments:

  1. I have complete faith that you did not forget or overlook anything. This cycle has been too important for you. I can't tell you how happy I am that you have had such a wonderful response to this protocol. I know I haven't been commenting much, but I've been cheering for you every day.

    Taking a stab at "why the worrying?"...I think that it feels so good to feel like things are in our control that we can't allow ourselves to fathom that they are not (always). For me, worrying was my "self-protection" mechanism kicking into full throttle, letting me figure out what or who I could blame if things didn't go the way I'd hoped. It was always easier that way.

    Hold on to your hope and excitement, and try not to let your self-protection mechanism steal away the joy of this cycle for you (I know...easier said than done). You are in my thoughts.

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  2. Ahh I can't believe how close you are now! I'm sure you did everything perfectly! I'm so excited for you. Thinking of you!!

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  3. I also have trouble letting things go that I cannot control. I hope everything goes well tomorrow!

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  4. I know it's soooo hard not to worry, but you did everything right in regards to the trigger shot! Tomorrow morning will go smoothly, I just know it! I can't wait for an update!!! :)

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