Monday, February 7, 2011

Being IF is a full time job

My first IVF consult is this Thursday.  It is less than 3 days away.  I’m freaking out.  It doesn’t help that Blue wont be there with me, at least my mom will be, guess I’ll never grow up!

I have a whole list typed out of what I want to ask.  I even have a printed list of what I need to do before Thursday so I’m ready.  Normally lists help calm me, but this time around it isn’t working.

The fertiles of this world love to tell the infertiles to “just relax”.  It happens often enough that there are whole blogs titled after that ridiculous but frequent comment.

Here is my response:  I did relax.  I relaxed for the first 6 months we tried.  I relaxed for as long as it took you to make it through your first trimester, maybe even second if this hypothetical fertile got pregnant the first month she tried.

It’s easy to relax when “trying” is still fun.  After that you don’t get to just relax anymore, you get to chart, go to gobs of doctors appointments, get blood drawn countless times, take drugs that make you crazy, etc. 

Working harder at being stress free is even more stressful.  Acupuncture appointments?  What will I tell my boss when I need to take yet another hour off of work for a doctor’s appointment once a week?  Pretty soon he’s going to think I have cancer.  As it is I have to take the whole day off Thursday to drive 3 hours for my IVF consult.

Being an infertile is a full time job.  In fact I’ve spent the entire morning while at work just trying to get prepared for this doctors appointment, googling ridiculous things, etc. 

Anyway, here is my current list of questions for Dr. BFP.  Are there anymore you think I should add?  Maybe with your additions I’ll feel prepared enough to relax a little?

1.       What protocols do you use for Endo patients?
2.       Being a 26 year old stage 3 endo girl what are my chances of success?
3.       Immunology testing, natural killer cells, antiphospholipid antibodies? Intralipids administration pre-IVF?
4.       Hormone tests needed before I can start BCPs again and enjoy life pain free for a few months?
5.       Should I have another laparoscopy before to clean up endo/cysts?
6.       Ultrasound monitoring: Who are good docs to work with?  Have you worked with Base docs before?
7.       When would I need to be there (since its 3 hours away)?
8.       Do I need to be on bed rest after transfer?
9.       Are there any supplements I need to take for the next few months to get ready?


  1. Good list. From what I have heard this is a very smart man so I think "we" are in good hands. I cant WAIT to hear what he has to stay.

    Travel safely!!!!!!

  2. Reading your post makes me laugh and laugh. I write lists incessantly, and actually would send my typed out questions and recommendations for IVF protocols to my RE a day or two before my appointment, just so he wouldn't be too overwhelmed when I came charging in for my consults. Your list is great! I would ask if intralipids would be helpful, too. The research is still a little shakey on whether endometriosis acts the same as other immunological diseases when it comes to implantation, but my RE is recommending intralipids, just to be safe during the donor cycle. It would be a shame to waste good embryos. You could ask about IVIG, too, but intralipids are way cheaper and do the same thing. Both are commonly used when natural killer cells are an issue, but I think their use is becomming more popular for endo, too.

  3. Great list! Oh man, I hate the just relax comments. I STILL get them, even from people who know that we need medical intervention to get pregnant! Good luck!! Thinking of you!

  4. I just love your posts, so I wanted to let you know that I nominated you for two awards on my blog - I can really relate with a lot of pieces of your situation and enjoy sharing our journey.