Monday, November 7, 2011

I pick Infertility

I don’t remember who told me this story (maybe it’s an old proverb) but it goes something like this:  If we were all to write down our problems on a slip of paper and toss them on to a table, then rifle through and pick which problem to have, we would all pick back up our own problems because that’s what we know how to deal with.

I learned the truth of this lesson this weekend.

One of Blue’s good friends and his girlfriend ended up with a little surprise a few years back, they were excited about it and got married and have had a great time since.  They had a totally natural pregnancy with a home birth (for the record I’m not a big fan of this.)  Their little girl is 3 now and is so precious and such a joy to be around.  I have to admit I’ve spent quite a bit of time being jealous of them, wondering why that couldn’t have been us too?

Even lately, since I’ve been pregnant, I’ve wondered why I couldn’t have a perfect pregnancy like her?  She never had an US, ate organic the whole time, etc.  I’ve sat on my couch numerous times pouting, wondering why pregnancy wasn’t so perfect for me…

About 3 weeks ago the husband started feeling strange and having numbness in his legs.  They tried seeing a naturopath and doing heavy metals testing.  When none of the homeopathic remedies made a difference they went in for an MRI and just found out he has MS.  On top of that, they own their own chiropractic business and don’t have health insurance.

Now suddenly I don’t want to trade problems.

I just want to stay right here in my pregnant after IF life.

My heart is breaking for all of them, for how this will change the course of their lives.  I wish I could do anything to help, but for now I think the only thing I can do is give them time to process the diagnosis.


  1. I can relate to him. I sadly have MS and infertility, way too much to handle!

  2. Oh my goodness. :( How awful. Some days infertility seems like the worst thing in the world, but other days I'm thankful that's all I have to go through... When I was with my BFF who lost her daughter at 4 days old I was definitely thankful I wasn't having to bury my own daughter even though I felt immense pain, sadness, and loss too. The other part of thought they were blessed because they at least got to have a baby together and see/hold their miracle, something I may never get... Disgusting, I know, and I'm embarrassed to admit it, but the grass isn't always greener on the other side!

  3. grass isn't always greener is it? I think about that with my fertile friends and realize they may have the kids I want, but I have the marriage they want.

  4. It is so true that sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side. I hope that they are able to process and move forward soon.

  5. I don't know how it is that I'm just now seeing this, but my heart is breaking for them!