Dr. Sher only scheduled ultrasounds for 7 weeks and 10 weeks. Logically I know this makes sense since you can’t see a heart beat until between 6 and 7 weeks anyway, so why get attached so early if it isn’t going to work?
Problem is, I’m already attached.
And now I sit and wait. And wait some more.
I’ve heard nothing since the final, fabulous, beta.
I alternate between embracing this pregnancy fully: blabbing to everyone, knitting baby booties and sweaters, talking to the bubbles, etc. and being scared shitless: go.og.ling success rates after doubling betas, lack of symptom spotting (symptom spotting’s nasty 2nd cousin), etc.
I’m not sure what to do with myself. Going through IVF has a nice level of instant gratification, apparently I’ve gotten too used to it and I suck at waiting now. Even the daily shots aren’t so bad because it means you’re doing something every day. I guess I shouldn’t complain since I’m still taking the Bangladeshi hooker meds and a progesterone shot in the butt daily, but I just want to know if I’m actually pregnant or not.
Will my whole pregnancy be this way? Will I stress between every ultrasound? Is this just another shit sandwich that IF has served me? I thought I beat that bitch, but now it seems if I’m lucky enough to still be pregnant that I’ll be worried the whole time and won’t enjoy it.
Yes you will worry the whole time. But it's exciting as well. Getting pregnant is just the beginning of the journey. For some of us it just takes longer to get there.
ReplyDeleteThe worry starts to get a little better. I was holding my breath between every appointment with my RE after I got my positive test. I was a WRECK when he released me. Now I'm feeling a bit better - just had my 12 week NT scan the other day and I am breathing a bit easier for the first time this pregnancy. My husband and I also bought a fetal heart doppler for about $50 from a medical supply place on eBay... we were able to start hearing the heartbeat at home around 10 weeks or so... that's provided a ton more assurance and comfort. Embrace your pregnancy - you worked SO HARD for it, you deserve to enjoy!!
ReplyDeleteI think after the u/s you will worry less, at least that is how I thought I would be and now I have a countdown going until my 12 week u/s which feels like forever away!! 26 days, but who's counting?? Seeing the heartbeat really reassured me as well and we all know that when we see the heartbeat chances of miscarriage after that are very, very small. Many women have m/c around 10 or 11 weeks only to find out the baby stopped growing at 6/7 weeks, so my friend, hang in there until you see that beautiful heartbeat! One day at a time....maybe we should have a countdown party?
ReplyDeleteI agree that there's something reassuring about all the things to do through IVF. I worry that I'm going to worry for every day of 40 weeks, if I ever get pregnant... there must come a time when the nerves ease off - at least a little :) Love to you and bub xoxo
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